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Misato, Sunday 12th October
A determined display of old-fashioned football on a hot Misato day saw the Panthers climb into the Top 5 jungle of Division 3. Overhead kicks from outside the box; crazy red cards; diving headers; double turns on antique sixpences; pitch invasions and streakers – there was none of that in this mid-table scrap that ended honours even.
Facing a team that had scored 5 goals in both of their games so far, a strong defence was mandatory, so Nick ‘Tsun Zu’ Webb employed the diamond formation with a defensive midfielder to provide cover for the back four.
From the off, Tom and Paul led the line like Nelson and Collingwood; old-school strikers, full of bustle, causing panic in the opposition ranks with neat one-twos and simple link-up play. Webb had studied Zulu Warfare at Scout Camp and cunningly chose the Bull’s Horns Technique as an attacking device. The first part worked like a voodoo charm as the two forwards sucked in all four defenders. However, the killer pincer movement of the encircling horns just didn't materialize as the wingers were just so keen to play up front too. This resulted in the lesser-known Blob Formation in midfield, which while opening up the game for both sides, failed to produce any clear cut chances for either.
There were moments. One great move mirrored the great Rivelino World Cup Final goal of 1970, with Tom as Pele laying it off to Rivelino Lee. He promptly smacked it over the bar and onto Haneda’s radar system. Moments later he made up for it with a great tackle (technically legal only in rugby) on their incoming striker who also ended up on Haneda’s radar.
A clever run by Romen saw him through on goal but a chotto dodgy offside decision from their linesman prevented him from showing us he can’t finish for toffee. His new bitch puked in disgust. It’s a lovely puppy. (It actually starred in the hit Broadway play about a Jewish New Yorker who adopts a stray dog while in Japan, called Solomon and Shiba.)
In the 2nd half, the Panthers came out snarling and started to dominate. This was mainly due to sturdy work in defence by Mikhail, Saco, Chris and the two Andy’s. Paul was denied from a supersave by their keeper when one-on-one, and Kev had a great chance to win it but drilled a firm shot too near the keeper.
One harsh booking aside (that caused a post-match bout of apoplexy), the ref had a good game keeping it flowing by giving us nothing but not calling us on much either.
The opposition played the usual triangles and some nice one touch pass and move, but were pretty much kept in check. A few theatrics but a fair bunch overall.
Lesson to be learned would be not getting on each others backs. Mikhail made one error and it was panic stations. Air-raid sirens and a three minute warning. The Cold War is over, Comrades. We are friends now… despite the gas supply blackmailing; dumping us out of Euro2008; poisoning our guests on the streets of London; and making Chelsea trendy. Here Yea: Lenin was paralysed by a stroke so he learned to write with his other hand to continue his work. Stakahnov dug out a coalmine single-handed in a few days. The hardy citizens of Leningrad built a railroad over Lake Ladoga in winter to lift a three-year siege by the Wermacht. If there is one thing any winning team needs, it’s a Russian. The real culprits today were Kev, who made more mistakes than anyone on the pitch, and the ‘wingers’, who had the positional sense of butterflies at sea. We all play well most of the time, and crap now and again, so no more scrapping between ourselves, please. Tolerance of occasional mediocrity will help us get into the Top 3.
The positives: Andy V and Saco were superb; Vince had a blinder keeping a clean sheet, including a fantastic stop at the near post late on; Romen got stuck in and ran at people to impress his pooch; and overall, it was a solid performance by the whole team. A bore draw on paper but an enjoyable game and a fair result over all. We should take them next time.
Next game sees Panthers up against Shane. “ Mama said she loved you, Shane ” - Well Your Mama loves losers, Boy! The ship has been steadied, let’s take home three points next week.
Report by Dale Kerrigan
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