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Hachioji Park, Monday 17th September,
Groundhog Day for champions BFC as they beat the Saitama JETS by their favourite 4-1 scoreline to make it two wins out of two this season.Vags beating BEFC 1-0 put them third in the table and meant many of us can expect some long delays applying for new passports.
ATTRITION
For 40 minutes BFC knocked on the door but it took just 10 second half minutes to force it open, a freak own goal quickly followed by a Carlos Arnada penalty virtually sealing the points for the TML champions. Goals from Pablo Pomares and Danny 'Le Bon' were the fairy lights on the tree.
Once a looping ball from Leigh Manson had triggered panic in the JETS defence, prompting a defender to slice an attempted clearance over his own goalkeeper, BFC's second straight victory never looked in serious doubt.
Moments later, a sexy three-man triangle (nothing gay -- move along!) between Shosuke Yamagishi, Alastair Himmer and Pomares culminated in Yamagishi being clattered yet again and Arnada stepping up to bury the spot kick for 2-0.
The JETS were understandably upset (though could have no real complaint about the penalty decision, which was spot on) because they had squandered the best chance of the first half despite being under the cosh from the start.
FREDDIE STARR ATE MY HAMSTER
Only a superb covering tackle from Rouven Woszidlo, fast proving to be the summer's top signing, prevented Nate Gildart from pulling the trigger with only BFC goalkeeper Jason Leonardis to beat.
BFC continued to probe after the restart, skipper Jon Day heading over but once the barricades had been breached it was all but over as a contest, with all due respect to a JETS side who are more than capable of troubling the best sides in the league.
BFC's third goal, Pomares breaking from midfield and prodding the ball past the onrushing JETS keeper from the edge of the box, killed the game off before Le Bon danced past two defenders to fire the ball home from 20 metres with 15 minutes left for 4-0.
A late consolation goal through Gildart late on took a smidge of gloss off but did little to detract from a solid performance from the back line, particularly Brian 'The Engine' Doyle and Manson, who both continue to tweak the nose of Father Time. Like a fine wine etc. etc.
For Doyle and Pomares, indeed, these BFC games are merely a side-show to their weekly marathons and synchronised shaving sessions. On the matter of shaving, Yamagishi went from the sublime to the ridiculous on unveiling his shaved tackle during the pre-match stretches. For the love of God!
Moving swiftly on, Man in Black Pietro had an excellent game, missing very little and refereeing with common sense and his usual good humour.
4-1 then, a result BFC chalked up no less than four times last season. They would settle for that every week but know they face a stiffer challenge against Hibs at the weekend.
LASER CONTROLLED GLOVES
A final word on Leonardis, who became the first 'professional' player in 27 years of BFC history after turning up in NASA-endorsed goalkeeping gloves that would have done Kenny Everett proud -- and promptly invoiced the BFC for them. Respect!
Fitted with lasers and GPS, the gloves had a tractor-beam effect on the ball (and winged insects inside the penalty box) -- until Gildart's strike at least. Leonardis was asking for his money back as he picked the ball out of the net.
After failing to successfully negotiate a game-by-game bonus for clean sheets, the American 'goal-tender' graciously said he would settle for a pair of Bose headphones for his iPod instead. Reuters can rest easy. For now.
Report by Knackered Converse
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